Dating and politics: How does your vote influence your romantic prospects?

Key takeaways:

• Political views are increasingly influencing romantic choices, with 43% of Democrats and 24% of Republicans prioritizing political alignment over sexual compatibility.
• With 14% admitting they wouldn’t date someone who supports an opposing party, 22% of Americans have lied about their beliefs to avoid conflict in a relationship.
• Some 33% of Americans have suffered a breakup in which politics played a part, with discrimination against other races, genders, or sexualities the most likely to harm someone’s dating prospects.
• Interest in politics is important for many US adults. However, 49% agree it’s unattractive when a partner spends too much time arguing over politics on social media.

Alongside religion, marriage, and your ex, it’s an unwritten rule of romance that discussing politics should be off the table during a first date. You’re there to have fun, and arguing over inflation, immigration, and healthcare certainly isn’t that.

However, perhaps that notion is outdated. With an election on the horizon and America more divided than ever over what’s best for the country, why waste time with incompatible matches?

Flirtini’s presidential elections survey quizzed 1,500 Democrat, Republican, and Non-partisan Americans on how a potential partner’s political views impact their attractiveness. It’s said that opposites attract, yet that isn’t always the case when it comes to politics, with a match’s preferred party often deciding whether a relationship stands the test of time.

United or divided? Politics’ role in dating

While a long-lasting relationship doesn’t require agreement on everything, it seems politics is one area many couples must be on the same page about. Some 14% of Americans admit they wouldn’t dare dating across party lines - regardless of how compatible they might be.

The economic downturn, reproductive freedom, climate change… and what matters most in a relationship. Is there anything that Democrats and Republicans don't disagree on? While 43% of Democrats believe that nothing matters more to a romantic relationship than political compatibility, just 24% of Republicans feel the same way. For 49% of those who vote red, sexual compatibility trumps political ideology every time.

Dating apps have made it far easier to determine whether a match is worth pursuing. You can swipe through hundreds of profiles in minutes and get a good sense of whether things would work between you. But wouldn’t it make life easier if we all willingly shared our political views? That depends on your party.

While 44% of Democrats think it’s a great idea, 36% of Republicans aren’t so sure. If you find them attractive and your interests match, does politics really matter?

Uncivil unions: Is politics pulling couples apart?

Having met someone special and desperate not to let politics dictate their love lives, 22% of Americans have lied to a partner about their beliefs. Another 15% would pretend they vote for the other side if their relationship depended on it.

But openness and honesty are critical to a healthy relationship - and lies and secrets always come out eventually. When they do, they’re likely to leave the deceived partner feeling wronged. Unsurprisingly, 22% of Americans admit they would feel betrayed, and another 26% say they would be concerned if their partner suddenly switched political parties.

Of course, you have every right to change your views, but if you find your political ideology swaying, it’s best to be honest. If they can’t get past it? Maybe it wasn’t meant to be.

If your political views have cost you your relationship, you’re not alone. Some 25% of Americans have suffered a breakup due to political incompatibility, while another 8% felt it was a contributing factor.

The good news? With the popular vote split almost 50/50, there are millions more fish in the sea who share your political views.

The power of perception: Do looks decide the vote?

Making a good first impression is important - both in dating and politics. As well as using political views to determine whether somebody is worth dating, many Americans use looks to determine whether somebody is worth voting for. Some 53% of Democrats and 38% of Republicans admit they judge candidates’ appearance to decide who gets their vote.

As such, each presidential hopeful’s candidate approval ratings might not depend on their policies, but rather their appearance. And for any political candidates looking for winning election campaign strategies, perhaps a glow-up is in order.

“Swiping left” on politics: The top ideologies turning partners off

There is one thing that most voters agree on: hate isn’t hot. Some 54% - red, blue, and everything in between - find believing in racial superiority or nationalism unattractive. Likewise, 27% value support of gender equality, dating those with similar beliefs to their own, while 22% find those against same-sex marriage to be a walking red flag.

In general, any extremities aren’t great for your dating prospects, and that goes for those with an intense passion for politics too. Some 49% of Americans admit they find those who spend too much time online engaging in political arguments on social media unattractive.

That said, opting out of the vote could also reduce your dating pool, given 5% of Americans wouldn’t date someone who feels it’s unimportant to pick a side and another 22% would be concerned enough to try and sway them.

In a polarized United States, whether you’re a democrat or republican, dating and politics go hand in hand. While love isn’t always about agreement, your relationships could depend on one question: do you find Trump or Kamala more attractive?

Methodology:

This research was conducted by Flirtini using internal polling. Flirtini researchers and experts surveyed 1,500 Democrat, Republican, and Non-partisan Americans across the U.S. The study includes participants of all genders and ethnicities over 18 years old.

The respondents were asked a range of questions on how politics impacts their relationships.

The data was collected in September 2024.